There are three items that are misconstrued in life and marriage. These three things are, for some, thought to be the work of an evil being. However, my goal through this post is to change how you see these three items.
These items were created by God and they all have a godly purpose. Reality is in the eyes of the beholder, and through this post, its my goal to give you new eyes to see how these three items are God’s gift to us.
The first has to do with our humanity. This fight goes back to 1 Corinthians 6 where Paul is explaining that what we do in the body does matter. Back in Paul’s time there were those teaching that what we did in the body did not matter because God was spirit. Since God was spirit, He was only concerned with what we did in our spirit. Christians can look at our humanness and say it is bad. Why? Because it makes them do evil things, think evil thoughts, and stops them from focusing on doing Godly things. Just because we are weak, we interpret that to mean God made a mistake in creation when he formed our humanness. No! Just the opposite, it is our humanness that makes us unique. Think about it. Angels look on us in wonder. The Bible says they long to understand forgiveness – something they do not get the luxury of experiencing. We have to remember that it is God who created us and gave us flesh – who made us human. We are the only thing, in all of our creation, that was made in his likeness. In fact, when God finished with the creation story the Bible says, “God saw all that he had made, and it was very good” (Genesis 1:31a). We have to stop looking at our humanness as a weakness and begin seeing it is as what separates us from anything else in all creation.
The second misconstrued item in a marriage is darkness. From an early age, we look at darkness as some type of evil. Darkness is something that we quickly learn to fear. Why is this though? It was not until recently that I began reviewing this whole aspect of darkness in a new light. What I found in the creation story, in my story, and I am sure you will find in your story as well. We are created in darkness. Think about it…how long were you in your mother’s womb before seeing the light of day? Our marriages go through darkness, but rather than seeing it as an evil – my aim in this post is for you to start seeing it as place to create the best possible future. In order for a picture to be displayed to the public, it first must be developed in the dark. The same goes for our marriages. In order for the good to be seen in public, the bad must be dealt with in the darkness.
Finally, conflict is something seen as either dark, evil, or bad. However, it is through conflict that we learn to grow deeper. It is when conflict arises that our best work is done in our relationship. We break out of the old skin, shed the old habits, and grow into our new relationship. Conflict is what strengthens a marriage (or relationship), it should not weaken one.
Begin to see these three items in a new light in your relationship. If you do, then you will begin to experience peace like never before. Which of these three items do you need the most work at seeing in a different light?