Okay, some of you might be thinking that I am suggesting that you have sex every day for a week. Although that might be a good challenge to take on as a couple, that is not what this post is about. You have heard of a television network that takes a specific week to discuss Sharks, well this week has been my Sex Week…hence the title.
There is a difference between what is good and what is great. We know this to be true in the business sector, thanks to the book “Good to Great” by Jim Collins. What about in our relationship? What about in our sex lives? Don’t we deserve to have the great? Not to say that at times it’s just going to be good.
How do we get the great? The greatness comes through time. This is why commitment is so important in having a great sex life. When we are together with someone for a length of time we are able to unpeel the layers. Trust is built and when this happens we allow the other person deeper access into what makes us tick.
When these recesses of our lives become open it then allows us to become freer in how we express ourselves to our partner. If this is the case, then how do we get here? Again, this comes by way of knowing each other is committed.
Now, what is the ultimate expression of commitment. Is it telling someone that you love them? Well, no, because there are those that throw that word around just to get in the sack with someone they find attractive. Okay, then, is it moving in with someone? This is a stronger sign of being committed. However, the only contract in this relationship is the lease/rent agreement. If something were to happen, there is nothing stronger than this contract keeping the two together.
The ultimate sign of commitment is found only in being married. I know that today’s culture seems to be anti-marriage. I believe this is mostly due to the divorce rate. However, I believe it also has to do with how marriage is seen in the eyes of today’s youth. Where has this change come from; especially when statistically 66% of married couples are happy.
I believe this is due to the misconceptions of those in the Baby Boomer generation. This generation was more about obtaining goods and services their parents did not have in their lives – mostly due to the Great Depression – then staying connected to their spouse. I see this in the “words of wisdom” these Baby Boomers spew to the younger generation. They try to encourage young kids to wait to get married until they are in their 30’s because they learned that they changed so much from 20 to 35. Yes, we change, but as long as you continue to communicate these changes taken on new meaning in your relationship. These changes do not mean that couples need to divorce because they are “no longer in love.” There is more to say, but that will be another discussion for later.
Commitment is needed to experience the best sex and this is truly only found when two couples are married. Others would say they don’t need a piece of paper to be committed. However, I would say if you are that committed, why not get married?